Right Doctrine Matters: Just Because You Skip Church Doesn't Mean You're Not Right With God

Hebrews 10:25, “Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching.”

I cannot tell you how many preachers (mostly church pastors), have taught from the pulpit that you are not right with God if you skip (or miss) church. I have had fellow believers berate me for my medical condition over the years, scolding me for not coming to church all the time.

In 2014, at the Harvest Baptist Church on Guam, a man at church asked me if I was coming on Sunday to church. I honestly replied: “It depends on how I feel because of my neck injury.” He rudely quoted our text passage of Scripture, saying: “Forsake not the assembling of ourselves together, Brother!” I said nothing, being far more of a gentleman than he is.

In 2018, at the Lighthouse Baptist Church on Guam, a woman in front of her husband scolded me for not attending every church service. I kindly explained to her (which is really none of her business), that I take pain medications for chronic neck pain, and need to be responsible about it. I come to church when I can, when I feel up to it. She rudely replied: “Well we have a man with a heart condition in our church, who takes the same medications as you do, and he is always here!” I rarely reply to people, simply because if they are rude enough to insult me, then they will almost assuredly argue with me, and I don't need that.

I wanted to sternly reply to her: “No, he takes heart medication, but I take pain medication. I also take a prescription drug to help me sleep at night, and another drug to cope with radiating nerve pain in my limbs. So in fact we DON'T take the same medications! You don't know what you're talking about! You ought not compare me with anybody else.”

What saith the Scripture? 2nd Corinthians 10:12, “For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise.” The inspired Word of God says that it is unwise to compare our self to others. That means you! That means me! I have no right to judge you, looking down upon you based upon your church attendance pattern. I have no Biblical right to pressure you, because you don't come to church as much as I think you ought. I don't know your full medical situation (even though some people might arrogantly think they do). I don't know how you feel at any given time, and neither do you know how I feel.

I am fortunate if I get to 50% of church services. I feel constant burning throughout my body's nervous system. I have the opposite of Peripheral Neuropathy (which is damage at the nerve endings in arms and legs). I have what is medical called: Radiculitis (damage to my spinal cord, the nerve root). The unpleasant feeling is the same. My hands burn. My arms burn. My shoulders burn. Both of my arms feel inflated with air all the time. The whole right side of my body feels half asleep all the time, which is why I have a pronounced limp when I walk. This is most noticeable from standing up from a sitting position, feeling like “dead weight.” I can walk the limp out usually after a few minutes, but then if I sit down and get up, I limp much.

The bony area of the back of my neck hurts all the time, feeling like a big toothache in my neck. It is a continual bone-gnawing type of throbbing pain. At worse times, which is almost a daily occurrence, the relentless neck pain burns, which is unbearable. I took 80 mg per day of prescription Oxycontin for 11 years, but since I have moved to the uncaring state of Florida, my new doctor has reduced my Oxycontin down to only 40 per day, which is simply not enough. I am suffering in pain. People at church cannot see my pain. They don't intend to be rude, inconsiderate or abuse, but they do it in sincere ignorance, pressuring me to come to church all the time. I simply cannot, and won't! I must be responsible to stay home when I need to. In the past, at other churches, I forced myself to be there for every church service. The consequential result was that I ended up quitting church completely for years.

I wrote this blog to encourage others who don't make it to every church service. It is okay dear friend. God knows your situation. God knows how you feel. The dear Lord understands your pain, suffering and that sometimes you just don't want to be around people. Psalms 103:14, “For he knoweth our frame; he remembereth that we are dust.” Jesus cares! ...

1st Peter 5:7-9, “Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you. Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour: Whom resist stedfast in the faith, knowing that the same afflictions are accomplished in your brethren that are in the world.”

I won't make this a long blog. I've made my point. Please don't ever allow anyone to put you down, belittle you, hurt your feelings or make you feel that you are not right with God, just because you miss church. I have heard Baptist preachers pound the pulpit and tell people that they ought to be in church every time the church doors squeak on their hinges. I don't judge those preachers, but I disagree with them when it comes to certain matters. The plain truth is that there are times when we ought NOT go to church. If you are sick, you shouldn't go to church where you will infect others, and make everybody sick (Matthew 7:12).

Some churches meet once a week. Others two times a week. Before COVID-19, most churches met three times per week. Pastor Dwight L. Moody (1837-1899) was so popular as a preacher that they held church services at Moody Church seven nights a week, and had two services each night! Amen! But does God expect those individual church members to attend all 15 services (including Sunday morning)? Of course not!

Attending church is a personal matter. No one should pressure, condemn or put you down for staying home. You don't owe anybody an explanation, except God. On many Saturday nights, I cannot sleep. I have difficulty sleeping because of my nerve burning and radiating pain from my neck into my arms and legs.

Not too long ago, an insensitive woman at church hurt my feelings. Someone else had asked me if I was able to sleep better at night (she had kindly given me some Benadryl tablets to try). I told her the truth, “no.” But the other insensitive woman (who overheard our conversation) sarcastically said: “Why don't you get out of the house and go walking, or ride a bike!” She had no right to say that, as if I hadn't thought about those things. Religious people are sometimes cruel, when their lips move before their brain does, saying hurtful things.

I am not saying that we should view going to church as a trifle matter, or something to fit into our spare time, God forbid. The local New Testament church is God's tool in this world. The church has never been a building, or a place of entertainment, or a place to perform religious rituals; but rather, a church is a called out assembly of born-again saints for the work of organized soulwinning (The Great Commission, Matthew 28:19-20), a believer's family, a place for believers to be comforted and encouraged, a place to build up the family, a place to find a wife or husband, and a place to be unconditionally loved with Christ's compassion.